How Bad Do You Want It?

How Bad Do You Want It?

Heyyyy! What’s Up? How y’all doing? I miss y’all! Okay so enough of the small talk! Lol! I know it’s been a while since I’ve taken time to chat it up with you all! I honestly feel I need to get this out while it’s fresh on the membrane! Lol! Y’all know I can’t be serious all the time! Lol! But I do miss and love y’all! 🤗😘

Anyhoo, Y’all I have been challenged on a whole new level and God has been checking me and getting me in order like never before! GO FIGURE! 🤷🏾‍♀️ And of course y’all know we tussled a lot because I’ve never been one for change and I can be very stubborn! We also know that God doesn’t care about none of that! None of the tantrums or whining and “whoa it’s me” moments! I’m either gone let Him work in and through me or I’m not! 🤷🏾‍♀️

I was at the hospital the other day with my mom for a procedure she had! I got to tell y’all about how God ministered to my heart about THE BLOOD!

But we will talk about that later! Just remind me 😂 BUT, While at the hospital God kept taking me to Revelations 3! Me being me, I was so excited! Yesss God, open up them doors that no man can Shut! But that wasn’t it y’all! 😂 I had to keep reading!

I said to Myself 😂 I said, Self? And myself said hmmmm! (In my best Mr. Brown voice) Whew Jesus!

I wanted to skip all over those scriptures after verse 8! Like God what you mean I need to be either or! Either or what? Ha! This must be a message you mean for me to send to someone else! Loud as ever, I heard, “NOPE, THIS FOR YOU DAUGHTER!” Yeah y’all can more than likely see my facial expression when He checked me! And it wasn’t just that He had me check them scriptures out, BUT the fact my Bible app was set to the Message version had me all types of messed up! Vomit! Stale! Stagnant! Those were sounding like some fighting words!

BUT… You see God has been dealing with me for the last couple months about healing! Healing on a whole new playing field! Since Sunday, God has been placing people on my heart that I needed to forgive! People I felt I was allowing to hold me in bondage because I allowed the hurt they caused me at different stages of my life to linger on! I’m not even going to lie to y’all, but the people He placed on my heart I just knew I was cool when it came to dealing with them!

Y’all know how we can get sometimes when we try to convince ourselves of the notion that: “I don’t have to be around them to prove I’ve forgiven them! Forgiveness doesn’t mean we have to still be connected!” 🔙 Yeah that notion! Granted there is some truth to that! But how many of you have used that phrase or a rendition of it to convince yourself that you’ve forgiven them???

RAISE THEM HANDS!!! Cause I’m not the only one! 🙄 The problem with this is that, although forgiveness may not mean that you have to continue to allow the same person the opportunity to keep bringing trauma to your life, SOME OF US NEVER FORGAVE IN THE FIRST PLACE! We never dealt with the deeper root of what was causing that unforgiveness! So the moment those people or that person would come around, you began to feel every ounce of that bitterness and pain that’s been stopping you up for years! Your whole digestive system need an enema because you’re so compacted!

That scripture had me realizing that it’s time for me to get some things in order! How can God use me when I can’t make up my mind on what it is that I’m going to do! Am I going to FORGIVE or am I gonna just keep pretending and saving face to make it appear pleasing in the eyes of others! God has a great chance of using and restoring someone that He feels isn’t stuck in the middle trying to play both sides! Stop straddling the fence! Live and Let God!

I’m always reminded of my good ole sister pal THE WOMAN WITH THE ISSUE OF BLOOD (LUKE 8:43-48)! LISTENNNNNN! TWELVE YEARS! You mean she suffered for TWELVE YEARS!

As I type, the only thing I hear is “AND you’ve been dealing with your mess just as long! That unforgiveness you haven’t given to ME! That hurt you refuse to let go of! That man or that woman, you ain’t married too, BUT yet you continue to hold on too! That addiction! That doubt! That fear! That Unbelief!” You see we are able to look at her story and see that YES she received her healing! YES she knew she couldn’t handle this on her own! How long did it take her to actually WANT IT! What was she willing to risk? At what point did she come to grips with the reality that this is ABOVE ME! I need a TOUCH! In the beginning she was like so many of us! Trying to fix things on our own! Putting trust in other people to fill the void and emptiness of our souls! Robbing Peter to Pay Paul (Do we still say that 😂). Using Sex, Drugs, TV, social Media, People until we are depleted of everything!

At what point of our lives will we get to the realization that God should be the FIRST that we desire to help us move past whatever barriers are placed in our way! We want Healing, Freedom, and to walk in Victory, BUT we aren’t making the effort to even receive any of it!

God can give us all the tools that we need! He can send all the people our way, BUT until we get to the understanding of HOW BAD DO WE WANT IT, then nothing will change!

The woman TOOK A RISK! She took a risk and TOUCHED THE HEM! What’s amazing to me, is that God knewwwww that wasn’t an ordinary touch! Peter was like Sir! All these people and you said who touched me (My rendition)! I could only imagine her desire for God at this point! Her posture within! It would have been a sight to see! Even visualizing it now has my heart in overflow of joy!

Anyhoo, Yes she took a risk twelves years later, BUT God wasn’t focused on the time!! It was her faith and belief in HIM, that brought forth her healing! Just imagine what else she experienced during that time! SIS was on a JOURNEY! In 12 years of being isolated from others! I know I love my personal time and enjoy distancing myself from others (New Season and God is YET dealing with me on this), But Whew I don’t even think I would be any good for 12 years! Them few months of lockdown with COVID had me ready to be around everyone! Until I had to be around everyone 😂

The point is, Sometimes it takes people longer than others to grasp it and get it! But when they get ittttttt and go after ittttt! Whew JESUS! 🙌🏾🙌🏾 Gloryyy!

God has paved a way for each and every one of us! My time and your time is totally different! If I focus on what you’re doing in your season, I become distracted and stagnant in my own season.

The most amazing thing about God, though…Y’ALL… is He will meet you right where you are (Give it up to my AMAZING SIS who ministered that to me last night)! Not only will He meet you where you are, but the Holy Spirit is such a gentleman (My Pastor let’s us know this often 😂) They all in my blog today, huh? But anyway! He’s such a gentleman and will do it so gracefully! 💛

The GRACE that He extends to us, should be the same Grace that we give freely to others as we journey through healing and forgiveness!

In order for me to advance spiritually and go to greater depths where God is concerned I knowwwwwww FORGIVENESS will have to become first nature to me! I can no longer allow the bondage of UNFORGIVENESS keep me STUCK! I’m not doing ANYBODY any good if I’m STUCK!

So ask yourself, “How Bad Do You Want It?” Your IT will vary, BUT the risk you take will be worth it! It will be worth it because once you take that step in FAITH towards Christ to TOUCH THE HEM OF HIS GARMENT, then He has the Rest COVERED! Just take that first step of OBEDIENCE as He Directs you and see exactly how He meets you!

Either you want it or you don’t! Nobody can make that decision for you!

I love y’all! Until Next Time…😘😉🤗


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